Hi Tom, Thanks so much for taking the time to comment. Unfortunately, as you say, it's very common and just human. BUT it's a pain in the ass. To break the cycle for me and my husband it is/was important to know what is the psychological background, It's all about control and we as parents have to find ways to take back this control over our lives. As soon as I've fugured out how to deal with it - despite not seeing them - I'll let you know. PS: You've inspired me to submit one of my articles to 'A Parent is Born'. That's the publication I've meant yesterday. Hab einen schönen Tag & bis bald, Kristina